Michigan, the land of milk and honey

Paige and the kids took off for Michigan in June for 7 weeks.

They love Michigan.  Paige gets to see her family, and the kids get to live the country life.  Lots of outdoors, adventures in the woods with Grandpa, mud, frogs, skunks.  Don't get much of that in Gilbert Arizona.

Rub a dub dub, five kids in a dump bucket.

Other than a sand pile, this might be Luke's favorite place... all you can eat berries.

Sophie, trying to sneak into Paige's bed.

"What Mom?"

Luke and Cousin Isaac, making some sort of dirt concoction.

Levi and Noah turned 7 while they were there.  Hard to believe they are 7 already.

Noah turning on the charm, for a very worthy purchase I might add.

Fishing is always a kid favorite.

As is frog hunting in the creek behind the house.

There is always a treat somewhere in Michigan to eat.

Lake Michigan, another summer favorite.

Digging up some long buried bones with Grandpa.  I think we finally decided it was a cow.

Grandpa built them a pretty cool treehouse.

And a wicked rope swing.

Always "farm" chores to do.

Another successful summer in Michigan!

Non-flammable? Challenge accepted!

In between rounds of Calvinball this summer, I did manage to squeeze in a trip to Utah to visit my buddy Bakker.

(An aside... the other morning Paige woke up claiming she had a nightmare. In this dream, I got Jonathan's name tatoo'd on myself.  She was horrified... but I briefly considered whether this sounded like a good idea or not.  Which I think only horrified her more.)

Anyways... after the usual stops...

Parking lot sleeping at the Flagstaff Little America...

Panoramic photo at whatever overlook this is...

The Pa(i)ge Arizona sign...

I made the drive to Salt Lake in one piece. We spent a few days doing what we always do... pretending we are little boys again. And now he is fortunate to have two boys of his own to pass these things on to. We showed them the pleasures of an open flame and molten glass...

Firearms...

Homemade smoke bombs...

Fireworks of the storebought kind. Also note that I am very jealous of the awesome shirt Bakker is wearing...

Tommy has obviously done this once or twice. He's got the word "more" down pat, and alternated between me and his father for near continuous fireworks.

Finally, there was the magical copper thermite powder. Maybe not the safest way to light the stuff (note open toed sandals and lack of safety eyewear.)

But it sure is pretty when it goes off!

Then it was back home again, and off to Michigan to catch up with the family a while later...

The grump and giblets

The other night, the whole family cleaned the house.  Well, mostly I think it was Mom and Dad cleaning, in between yelling at encouraging the kids to clean up the giant mess they made help the family.

Noah in particular was having a really rough time.  He had a serious grump going on.  So he got to clean the bathrooms with me.  After a half hearted wipe of the counter, I asked him if he thought it looked clean on not.

"Yes."

"Really?  You don't see the hair all over the counter?  Gross."

"They aren't my hair.  Why do I have to clean them?"

"I'll bet it is your hair.  Right off your chest!"

"Daaaaaaad, I don't have chest hair!"

"OK then... off your buns."

"Daaaaaaaaaaaaad, I don't have bun hair!"

"I know.  They fell right off your hairy grump!"

[Noah pulls open the front of his pants and peers down... there.]



"Nope.  Nothing there yet!"


Aye carrumba.  That was not what I meant.  But I guess we now have yet another name for it around here...

A few days before, while playing out in the backyard in sprinkers, Ella whips out this line...

Well, not the enchanted forest part, but definitely the giblets.

So two new names I guess...

Black and white

We were watching the Olympics the other day and women's volleyball was on.  All our kids were cheering for 'Merica, of course.  During a closeup shot of the 'Merican tean, Luke yells...

 "Oh no... wook!!! Two gorls fell down... a Arizonan and a Ethiopian!!!"

Needless to say, we were not playing Ethiopia, and I am not sure there were any Arizonans on the team.

(An aside... while watching one of the races, the 'Merican runner licked himself.  We decided that we were cheering for the Ethiopian instead in that race.)



Then a few days later, Luke and Sophie were sweating it out on the backyard swing.  After I got sick of the heat, I told them "c'mon cookies and cream, let's go inside where it's cool."

Luke says "Dats white! I am da cookie, and Sophie is da cweam!"

Mr. Cweam seems to have a few misunderstandings about the world.  But that's OK for now.

 

Rocky Point (the short version)

Just the highlights...

Paige caught a bird in the waves.  It didn't look so hot.

Little know fact... I have a serious bird phobia.  Hate the things.  They freak me out.  Completely unnatural creatures.  Plus they could peck your eyes out in a heartbeat.  Sophie apparently feels the same way I do.

Luke was in heaven with all that sand.

Sophie? Not so sure. I think she was refusing to follow us down the beach when I took this. She has this look very well practiced...

Cool looking moon.

Our rental house had a very small TV, a 3D version of Polar Express, and these fancy glasses. We were not impressed.

Ahhhh, twins. Sometimes it is like there is only one of them.

The tide was crazy high this year. Made it all the way to the steps of the house.

There isn't much point in trying to get them all to smile at the camera, because it just isn't going to happen.

Click to embiggen...

Ugh... blogging...

So people are harassing me about the lack of blogging.  They say they want more stories of the funny stuff our kids do.

Ugh.  So here's my excuse...

I've been working on the same project at work now for about 2 years.  The last few months (like... 12 or so...) have been a mashup of Calvinball and Dilbert comic strips...

Engineers are typically obsessed with specifications.  One of the first rules of Calvinball is "Any player may declare a new rule at any point in the game. The player may do this audibly or silently depending on what zone (Refer to Rule 1.5) the player is in."  The two just don't get along.  Which leaves you, at the end of the day, browsing the Despair.com site looking for a pick-me-up...

Then after that, it's home to face the Mongol horde, who no doubt have pillaged their way though every room in the house and over-run the defenders (aka Mom.)  I've heard several quotes along the lines of this one, from Hannah Arendt:  “Every generation, Western civilization is invaded by barbarians – we call them ‘children.’”

There are days when I think it would be easier to face these guys then walk through the front door...

It's like the Battle of Zama has occurred.  Inside our house.  Including the elephants.

And Paige can certainly tell her own side of the story, just so you don't think I am picking on her.  She's the one getting over run, and then I come home all hopped up and stumble into the aftermath, and freak out that there are still bodies scattered all over the field of battle.

Yeah, yeah... I realize I have it pretty good, all things considered.  I have a house, health, a wife who loves me, kids who claim to, a job, etc.  So I am only sort of complaining.  I'm just saying that after a long day of Calvinball, then spending 30 minutes trying to keep freaking out kids in their beds for early bedtime due to misbehavior, while reading Christian blogs in a desperate attempt to pretend that I don't just want to go in there and smack someone upside the head, under the illusion that I actually have my parenting act together, wondering if this whole "quiver full" deal was really the right plan...

...the last thing I feel like doing after all that is blogging funny stories about our kids that make it look like we have it all put together.

There's a reason these bottles are all half empty people...

Speaking of which, excuse me while I drop a few ice cubes in a glass and select a favorite.

Ahhh.... now on to the blogging.

So in the midst of the absolute meltdown tonight, over spelling words, I believe, after being sent to their rooms and told to get PJs on and go straight to bed, after being yelled at by their totally put together parents, after completely disobeying, and stretching (and breaking) every bit of patience we have...

One boy is sitting on the floor, putting on his PJs.  The other is disrobing, slowly, while ranting about what awful parents he has.  Buck naked, undies in hand, he makes his way back to his bed.

Aimed straight for his brother, who is sitting on the floor, from behind.

Swings one leg over him, and slowly draaaaaaaaaags right over the top of his head.

"Ewwwwwwww!!!  I can smell your stinkiness!"

Paige and I, despite being totally hacked at them, could not contain the laughter.

Sometimes it's that bit of laughter that keeps you sane...

Awwwww, thanks you little rug rats!

Got these pictures delivered on my cell phone today.  Hmmmm, now what could they be trying to say...

 

Nope.  Maybe this one?


Getting closer?

Ahhhh ha!  There we go!

Thanks kids.  Love you too!

The apple doesn't fall too far

A hot cup of coffee in an Ugly Duckling mug and people yelling at each other about politics.

The only thing missing is the kids saying "Dad, this is sooooo boring! Can't we watch cartoons?"

Happy Father's Day to me... and to my Dad.

That's definitely something to be thankful for...

Story relayed to me second hand, so I might get the exact details wrong, but you'll get the picture.  When Grandma was in town the other week, she was tucking the boys in and trying to get them to pray.  They each had to say one thing they were thankful for...

Noah:  "Video games." (or something like that.)

Luke:  "My sister Sophie."

Levi:  "That I lived to see another day."

Always something to be thankful for, my funny little man.