Ummmm, I think the eggs are done

Alternate post title: I think my wife might be trying to kill me

Paige ran out tonight to get something from the store, leaving me to tuck all the kids in bed. As we were finishing up our pre-bedtime game of Uno, I thought I got a vague whiff of something burning. Like hair, with maybe a slight sulfurish tint. My sniffer doesn't work so well though, so I figured I was imagination.

I should have paid better attention. A childhood of burning every imaginable substance under the sun may have utterly destroyed my sniffer. Oddly enough though, the one smell I still can detect fairly easily is smoke. And I can usually identify the substance producing it.

After tucking the kids in to bed, I walked back out to the living room. Odd, I thought I smelled it again. It did smell like wood smoke outside when I got home from work, but this wasn't quite the same odor.

Hmmmm, maybe Paige blew out a candle as she left the house.

After getting Ella a glass of water, I was walking back out to the living room.

From downstairs, I hear "BANG!"

Very odd. I head quickly downstairs, alert for any possible home intruders (hey, you never know!)

The smell of smoke is much stronger. Not good. Maybe the intruder lit the house on fire to smoke me out?

I found this instead...

Literally as I am typing this post, the phone rings. The caller ID says "Gymboree Store," where Paige was headed.

"Ummm, I left a burner on. I realized it on the way to the store, but I don't have my cell phone."

Yeah, so I discovered...